VOICE OF GLOBAL UMMAH

VOICE OF GLOBAL UMMAH
Volume 212, December 4, 2011
St. Louis, Missouri, USA

Editors: Mohamed & Rashida Ziauddin


IN THE NAME OF ALLAH, THE MOST BENEFICENT AND THE MOST MERCIFUL

("TRULY HEART RUST JUST AS IRON RUSTS, AND THEIR POLISHING IS SEEKING FORGIVENESS")

(www.xeniagreekmuslimah.wordpress.com)

ED NOTE:

As we indicated earlier, our main focus is on the welfare of HUMANITY. The concept of GLOBAL UMMAH is the first step towards attaining the larger step of ONE LOVE, ONE HUMANITY. Like many other extremists, we REFUSE to voluntarily imprison ourselves in a single box and with a smile and cheer, we extend our hand of friendship, love and affection to all human beings of all faiths, cultures and persuasions.

With such an approach indicated above, it should come as no surprise that we would work for the betterment of Ummah by seeking knowledge from all sources including highlighting news, articles from Christian and Jewish sources that are listed below. In a way, it is yet another step for us to focus on the common points of all religions.

Islam places a lot of emphasis on the stability of the smallest social unit - FAMILY. Both the father and mother's role is important in terms of contributing to a healthy FUNCTIONAL family.

Unfortunately certain Muslim men have unintentionally practiced the negative cultural aspects in the name of Islam which has ultimately culminated doing more harm than good to the family. Below articles are an eyeopener to the devastating impact on the children especially daughters who are raised without fathers at home. However by no stretch of imagination are we ever going to support the presence of the father at home if he has violated Islam on all counts in terms of committing the crime of severe abuse to his spouse and children.

Prophet Mohamed (SAW) is the best role model we ever can have in terms of his NOT ever emotionally or physically abusing any of his family members.

In this E-Zine, our focus is on continuation of "Fathers" and "Fatherhood" Part II as an extension from the previous issue. We start off from an Islamic perspective in terms of highlighting an excellent article on importance of fathers, followed by an article that analyzes the impact that absent fathers have on female development and college attendance and later with another article on the severe impact on the consequences of fatherlessness and yet another article on the best gift that a father can give - HIS PRESENCE.

We wanted to give an example to highlight the awesome work some Christian organizations have done to help those daughters who have no fathers as indicated in below note from www.daughterswithoutdads.net

Their Mission Statement sums it all: "Restoring women to wholeness, one life at a time". We in particular wanted to quote the first sentence of their MISSION:

"The mission of Daughters without Dads Inc. is to provide counseling, assistance and spiritual guidance for young girls and adult women based on Christian biblical values".

We apologize for our ignorance and lack of knowledge if anyone of you could e-mail and confirm one single Muslim organization in the global ummah that dedicates its exclusive service to helping Muslim daughters without dads. If you are aware of it, please e-mail us and we will publish it in our subsequent issue. Until we hear otherwise we are presuming that none exists.

WE HAVE A DREAM, THAT SOMEDAY, SOMEWHERE ACROSS THE GLOBE, A GROUP OF MUSLIM BROTHERS AND SISTERS WILL JOIN TOGETHER AND DEVELOP A ORGANIZATION WITH ITS FOCUS ON DAUGHTERS WITHOUT DADS AND ASSIST THEM BY PROVIDING COUNSELING AND SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE TO THE YOUNG MUSLIMAS BASED ON THE TEACHINGS OF HOLY QURAN AND HADITH.

WILL YOU HELP OUR DREAM TO TURN INTO REALITY ?

PART I

THE IMPORTANCE OF FATHERS:
www.iqrafoundation.com
(condensed version)

It is well known that Islam places a heavy emphasis on the importance of loving and respecting parents. In fact Allah (swt) has repeatedly mentioned in the Qur’an that parents hold the next highest status after our Lord and beloved Prophet (s).

Allah (swt) is our supreme provider, sustain-er, and protector. He uses parents as a means to provide us, as we grow, with food, shelter, clothing, guidance, and protection from harm. As creations of Allah (swt) we can never return the favors of our Lord except by being obedient and showing gratitude. The same can be said for parents. As children we can never repay the countless favors of our parents accept by being obedient and showing gratitude.

Allah (swt) says in Surah 17 Ayah 23:

“Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor.’

However, it is important to note that the role of a father is also highly recognized in Islam. It is said that,

“God’s pleasure is in the pleasure of the father, and God’s displeasure is in the displeasure of the father.”

Fathers are significant because they are commanded by Allah (swt) to work hard to provide the physical, educational, psychological, and spiritual needs of a child. ‘

Ali ibn al-Husain (r) is reported to have said:

“The right of your father on you is that you should know that it is he who brought you into existence, and you are a branch of the tree of his life.”

According to an article from Family and Consumer Sciences:

“Fathers are essential to the healthy growth and development of their children. Dads bring a unique perspective to the family and lives of their children.”

Fathers have a powerful influence on the healthy development of their daughters and sons.

School-aged children show significant gains in intellectual development when their fathers are involved with them as infants.

Involved fathers enrich their daughter’s and son’s self image.

Children who have involved fathers show more sense of humor, longer attention spans, and more eagerness for learning.

Father involvement helps teens to develop a strong sense of who they are and increases their ability to resist peer pressure.

Dads are role models who teach their children to be strong, flexible adults.

Fathers teach gender roles: they are generally more physically active with their sons and more protective of their daughters.

Fathers often think “out of the box” and offer alternative strategies for problem solving.
Dads tend to offer more physical play than mothers, which increases the physical competency of their young children.

When fathers model behaviors that are respectful to women, their sons are more likely to model their father’s respectful behavior as well.

http://fcs.tamu.edu/families/parenting/fathering/fathering_text/fathers_are_important.php

Islam encourages the need to show continuous kindness, respect, care, and concern towards fathers as it can often be difficult to keep a steady balance between working, taking care of a household, and fulfilling the many roles of a parent.

Abu Hurairah always encouraged other people to be kind and good to their parents.

One day he saw two men walking together and inquired of the younger one, “Who is this man to you?” to which the young man replied, “He is my father.” Abu Hurairah advised him by saying, “Do not call him by his name, do not walk in front of him, and do not seat yourself before he does.”

PART II

THE EFFECTS ABSENT FATHERS HAVE ON FEMALE DEVELOPMENT AND COLLEGE ATTENDANCE:

by Franklin B. Krohn, Zoe Bogan

Researchers agree the females who lack father figures are more prone to experience diminished cognitive development and poor school performance (Grimm-Wassil, 1994, p. 149). Children who experience early father absence inevitably have weaker mathematical than verbal skills and usually find it difficult to adjust well with others although fatherlessness alone does not cause poor adjustment (Adams, Milner and Schrepf, 1984, p. 140).

PART III

THE CONSEQUENCES OF FATHERLESSNESS

www.fathers.com

Some fathering advocates would say that almost every social ill faced by America's children is related to fatherlessness.

Six are noted here. ....Children from fatherless homes are
(1) more likely to be poor,
(2) become involved in drug and alcohol abuse,
(3) drop out of school, and
(4) suffer from health and emotional problems.
(5) Boys are more likely to become involved in crime, and
(6) girls are more likely to become pregnant as teens.

PART IV:

www.dadsworld.com

(1) 63% of teen suicides come from fatherless homes.
That’s 5 times the national average.

SOURCE: U.S. Dept of Health

(2) 90% of all runaways and homeless children are from fatherless homes.
That’s 32 times the national average.

(3) 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes.
14 times the national average.

SOURCE: Justice and Behavior

(4) 85% of children with behavioral problems come from fatherless homes.
20 times the national average.

SOURCE: Center for Disease Control

(5) 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.
9 times the national average.

SOURCE: National Principals Association Report

(6) 75% of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes.
10 times the national average.

SOURCE: Rainbow’s for all God’s Children

(7) 85% of all youths in prison come from fatherless homes.
20 times the national average.

SOURCE: U.S. Dept. of Justice

(8) Daughters of single parents without a Father involved are 53% more likely to marry as teenagers, 711% more likely to have children as teenagers, 164% more likely to have a pre-marital birth and 92% more likely to get divorced themselves.

(9) 91% of 701 fathers surveyed by the University of Texas at Austin agreed that there is a “father-absence crisis in America.”

What were the 4 major obstacles for fathers to overcome? 1) Work demands 2) The media 3) Pop Culture 4) Finances

PART V:

A FATHER'S BEST GIFT: HIS PRESENCE:

Jewish World Review Oct. 4, 1999

Kathleen Parker

A father's best gift? His presence

IT IS SAID that the best thing a father can do for his daughter is to love her mother.

A girl lucky enough to observe her "first man" demonstrating affection and respect for the woman with whom she most strongly identifies grows up with confidence and high self-esteem.

More likely than not, she'll set her standards high when seeking her own mate.

Now, new research published in the August issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggests that there's more fathers can do: Be there.

The gist of the study of 173 girls and their families is that girls who have a close, positive family relationship in their first five years --especially with their fathers -- enter puberty later in life. Specifically, the researchers found that girls reaching puberty later had fathers who were active caregivers and had positive relationships with the mothers.

Conversely, the researchers -- led by Dr. Bruce Ellis of the University of Canterbury in New Zealand -- found that girls who grew up without their father at home, or in dysfunctional homes where the father was present, entered puberty earlier.

Why? Apparently, girls' biological clocks are tuned not only to their physical environment but to the emotional atmosphere as well. We've all heard of female roommates who, after living together a few months, mysteriously synchronize their menstrual cycles. The same principle may apply to the onset of puberty in relation to the man of the house.

Ellis and his colleagues believe that girls subconsciously adjust the timing of their puberty based on their fathers' behavior. Pheromones -- those information-packed hormones we hear so much about -- hold the key.

The theory is that girls who grow up in a stable relationship with their biological father are exposed to his pheromones, which causes them to postpone puberty -- possibly as a shield against incest. Who knows? Maybe Neanderthal Dad was a randy creep when Mom was napping.

Girls who grow up with stepfathers or their mothers' boyfriends, on the other hand, are exposed to other-guy pheromones that may accelerate puberty. Draw your own conclusions.

PART VI:

DAUGHTERS WITHOUT DADS

www.daughterswithoutdads.net

Daughters without Dads Inc.

MISSION STATEMENT :

“Restoring women to wholeness, one life at a time”


MISSION :

The mission of Daughters without Dads Inc. is to provide counseling, assistance and spiritual guidance for young girls and adult women based on Christian biblical values. We offer several educational resources to help bring balance in adjusting to living and/or growing up without a father or other positive male influence in the household and/or community. Daughters without Dads Inc. will embrace all girls/women within the community in efforts to prevent and/or address such issues as self-esteem, purity, education, prevention of addiction and physical well being.

WHO WE ARE :

An organization that provides a safe and supportive environment where young girls and women who are dealing with situations, such as emotional imbalance resulting from a void in the home or community when a father or positive male relationship is missing. We want to open up the door for girls/women to have an opportunity to communicate and reflect on how they feel about father. We believe that an ounce of prevention is worth more than a pound of cure. We have a holistic approach to the well being of all girls/ women by addressing issues such as domestic violence and emotional wellness.

SERVICES OFFERED :

Monthly Recreational Activities
After School Program
Homework/Tutoring Assistance
Summer Soul Success ( 12 sessions)
One on One Mentoring
Parenting Support Network
Child Minding Services
Community Investment (Volunteerism)
Purity Program
Domestic Violence Support Services


THE END